The Only Place You Wanna Be
by maplexsyrup
Summary: Kristen tries to prevent the OCD Christmas Gala from becoming a disaster. "That's not my style, Gregory." Kremp. Secret Santa for x-wandering dreams!


**The Only Place You Wanna Be  
secret santa for x-wandering dreams  
**Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everyone

...

Wrapped in several layers of long underwear, under armor and Burton snowboarding gear, Kristen could almost block out the fact that the weather had long since dropped below freezing, and the wind was bringing a bone-chilling cold to Westchester. She had collapsed in a snowbank after shoveling the driveway of her family's house (it was a step up from the depressingly ugly Brickview Apartments, but barely) and she was lying on her back, snow-angel style, staring at the gray sky as tiny snowflakes kissed her cheeks. It was peaceful here, and she could feel the stress of the past few weeks starting to melt away.

"KRISTEN!" Marsha Gregory screeched from the front door. "Call for you from Principal Burns!"

Kristen's prestigious OCD scholarship was based on several things: academics (she had never gotten a final grade below an A in her life), sports (she was captain of the varsity soccer team) and school service. Usually that meant tutoring tiny idiots over the summer, but this year Burns had made Kristen organize the annual OCD/Briarwood Christmas Gala Fundraiser. Years ago, a few students had protested that the name be changed to the Winter Gala and the decorations to be purely nondenominational, but that year parent and alumni donations were so dismally low the name was changed back to the Christmas Gala and the event was restored to its former glory. Christmas is a time for giving to the less fortunate, and the Gala gave the wealthy residents of Westchester an opportunity to make charitable donations without having to be involved with anything so unsavory as the poor or the homeless.

For weeks Kristen had been calling the list of OCD-approved caterers, party planners, and decorators, and things had gone surprisingly well. The Grand Ballroom at the High HIlls Country Club looked like a winter wonderland, the extravagant silent auction items had been acquired, the performers had been practicing for weeks, and Kristen had bought a new dress for the big event.

"You all ready for tonight?" Burns squawked into the phone. It seemed like the bird lady was just waiting for Kristen to screw up.

"Yes, Principal Burns, everything is under control."

"It better be. I'm relying on the alumni donations for my winter vacation to Bora Bora. And if anything goes wrong, Miss Gregory, I'm blaming you. And I'm the one who signs your scholarship checks."

...

Parents, students and distinguished alumni had shown up to the High Hills Country Club in their most expensive dresses and designer suits, and they were complementing everything from the gourmet catering (an award-winning French chef had flown in to do the event) to the exquisite decor. The young children had so far managed to behave themselves, and instead of ingesting too much sugar and running through the crowd screaming, the youngsters seemed to be quietly sitting at tables with their parents, or else playing quiet games of Pokemon cards or Go Fish. The mothers and nannies of Westchester had trained their children well. The bidding on the silent auction items was getting high, but some of the teachers had been keeping an eye on things. Everyone was hoping to avoid the incident of '08 when two women had fought over an antique Tiffany necklace, eventually engaging in a tug of war that ended with the gold chain snapping in half and their respective families leaving in a huff without donating a single dollar to OCD and Briarwood.

The only thing that had been left up to the students was the entertainment. The Concert Band, Stage Band, Jazz Band, Choir, Vocal Jazz Group, and Glee Clubs from both schools had been rehearsing all manner of festive tunes, and there had also been auditions for various other performers. On stage, a group of girls was just finishing up a surprisingly good rendition of Owl City's _Peppermint Winter_, although they had made the unfortunate decision of wearing full-size striped candy cane bodysuits, complete with the curving part sprouting out the top of their heads like festive unicorn horns. The gala was running smoothly, and several teachers had congratulated Kristen on her success. Still, she was unhappy, mostly because of what had happened two nights ago when she had come to the club to do a check on the decorations.

...

_Kemp Hurley pulled an official-looking keyring out of his pocket, selected one, and turned it in the lock. The double doors to the ballroom opened and Kristen could see the whole thing had come together perfectly. Twinkly strands of lights hung from the ceiling and real, ten-foot Christmas trees had been decorated in ornaments that reflected the light. It was gorgeous without being tacky._

_"Wow," she breathed, "It looks amazing. Thanks for letting me in this late."_

_"No problem. Being the owner's son has its perks." He leaned against the wall and spun his keys casually around his finger. "There's just one problem, though."_

_"What?" she asked, "Everything looks perfect."_

_"No mistletoe," he said. "I thought with your famous brain, you'd think of everything."_

_Kristen laughed nervously. "I guess I forgot about that." She hoped that the lighting was dim enough that he wouldn't see her blushing. Her smarts were almost as notorious as Hermione Granger's, and sometimes she resented them. Like now._

_"Well, you'll have to track some down before the gala then, won't you? I might need an excuse to kiss a pretty girl."_

_..._

And he had left that night with a flirtatious look and a promise to see her at the gala, but so far he'd been MIA except for one occasion where she had seen him talking to Alicia at the bar. Well, she wasn't going to be one of those girls that obsessively followed Kemp wherever he went. If he wanted to ignore her, that was fine. Still, she kept looking around every once in a while to see if she could spot him amongst the Armani-clad boys at the table closest to the bar and farthest from the teachers. Maybe he would come find her. There was still time.

...

"Hey, great job with the gala," Claire Lyons said, emerging from behind one of the Christmas tress that lined the perimeter of the ballroom.

"What the hell are you doing behind that tree?" Kristen asked.

"Hiding from Burns. She made me introduce her to Jay and Judi and I couldn't get away. Her 'Lyons, tigers and bears, oh my!' jokes are getting seriously old. What act is up next?" The crowd was clapping and the candy-cane girls took awkward bows and shuffled off stage.

Kristen laughed and checked her watch. "It's 7:34, so the next group on should be... Strawberry, Kori, Olivia and Alexandra."

The lights dimmed low and the room fell silent as the curtain rose.

_"Santa Baby, hurry down the chimney toniiiiiight..." _Kori's sultry voice piped through the speakers as the crowd gasped. They had caught a glimpse of their outfits.

"Those dresses make the outfits in Mean Girls look frumpy," Claire remarked. It was true. The girls' red fur-trimmed dresses had criss-crossed laces up the sides, a slit in the already-short hemline, and a deep V that most strippers would be uncomfortable with.

The music changed, and the girls broke into a risque, albeit well-choreographed dance. Three shirtless boys ran on stage, their festive polka-dot boxers showing above the waistbands of their dress pants and tacky Christmas ties swinging against their bare chests. It was Derrick Harrington, Cam Fisher and Josh Hotz.

_"Light me up, put me on top let's fa la la la la, la la la la!" _The crowd fell silent. Ladies gaped and shielded their children's eyes, while husbands attempted to hide the fact that they were staring.

"I told Layne to play _Santa Baby_! She had the right music-" Kristen exclaimed. A flustered looking dark-haired girl came running over, panting and clutching her chest. Kristen and Claire looked concerned.

"I'm okay, I'm okay!" Layne said. "But I came back from the washroom and the sound booth was closed! Someone locked me out!"

"Oh my god, what am I going to do? This is pretty much the dirtiest dance to the dirtiest Christmas song ever. Burns is gonna kill me!"

"Enjoying the show, Gregory?" Kemp Hurley appeared from nowhere, clutching a drink that Kristen was pretty sure was scotch and looking entirely unfazed.

"No! This is a disaster!" she shrieked. Normally, Kristen would have tried to appear equally composed, but right then she didn't care if Kemp saw her lose her cool.

"Really? It looks perfectly _fine_ to me," he said suggestively, watching Olivia and Kori bump and grind to the music.

"I approved all the acts weeks ago, but Strawberry and Kori must have planned a completely different routine. Burns is going to blame me for this one, you know. She's probably having a coronary right now, but when she recovers I can kiss my scholarship goodbye."

"If the bird lady has a problem with this, she's really not going to like the end. The boys wrote HO HO HO on their asses and are going to moon the crowd at the end of the song. I heard Harrington bragging about it earlier."

"Are you kidding me? This can't happen, Kemp. There's gotta be a way to stop this. You own this place, for God's sake. Can't you do something?"

"And miss the show? You know that's not my style, Gregory."

"Fuck you, Kemp. You obviously don't understand how important this is." Kristen turned on her heel and stepped away from Kemp. _Screw him and his privileged little life. He's probably never had to worry about anything, _she thought, when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Relax, Kristen," he said, "I got it all under control." And with that, he melted back into the crowd.

_"THE ONLY PLACE YOU WANNA BE IS UNDERNEATH MY CHRISTMAS TREE!"_ shouted the girls, as the beat got faster and the dance moves got more and more scandalous. They were building up for the grand finale.

Kristen stared at the stage, biting her nails. She could picture Burns, a vein pulsating angrily in her neck, ripping up an official-looking piece of paper. In Kristen's head, Burns was yelling _"Kiss OCD and your future goodbye, Miss Gregory!" _and Strawberry and Kori were laughing and prancing around in their stupid outfits behind Burns' desk...

All of a sudden the music stopped and the Grand Ballroom went dark. Seconds later, the dim emergency lights came on, illuminating the room in a soft glow. The crowd started to buzz. Confused, thinking that it was their cue, the OCD choir, clad in white dresses and angel wings, filed on stage past a bewildered Strawberry and Kori. They began to sing, and soon everyone in the room joined in.

_"Silent night, holy night. All is calm, all is bright..."_

Across the room, Kemp caught her eye and he winked. She gave him the thumbs-up and smiled. Later on, if the timing was right, she would find some mistletoe and maybe she would kiss him as hard as she could. But for now, she just decided to enjoy the party.

...

_"I might need an excuse to kiss a pretty girl."_

_(your words in my memory, are like music to me)_

**You know what I want under my Christmas tree? Reviews :)**


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